June 15, 2023

Frequently Asked Questions by Women

These questions are very common for women whose male partners are having sex with men

Frequently Asked Questions by Women

1/ How do I know if I have an STI? 

Many STIs are symptom free, so it is always best to get tested. Please refer to our Resources page for Sexual Health Clinic details where STI testing is free even without Medicare.

2/ I can't ask my family GP for an STI test, where is it safe to go? 

Sexual Health Clinics are safe & discreet places to get tested for STIs.

3/ I found the medication or script for PrEP, what do I do? 

Finding medication can be confusing & upsetting, it is best you arrange an STI test for yourself to ensure your sexual health. We also recommend you speak to a health professional - https://www.shil.nsw.gov.au

4/ I feel so isolated, are there other women in my situation? 

Yes, there are many women whose male partner is having sex with men, it is not uncommon.

5/ Should I tell the children? 

It depends on the age of the children & the circumstances. If you decide to separate & your children are still young & living with you, it is best to tell the children together & tell them they are loved, however mum & dad are no longer together as a couple. A conversation with a therapist may help assist you with the process.

6/ Is he actually gay? 

Some men do eventually identify as gay, some men identify has bisexual & some men identify as heterosexual but attracted to the same sex. It is dependent on the individual & not one identity suits all.

7/ Is there something wrong with me? Did I cause this? 

No, there is nothing wrong with you as a woman. You are not responsible for another person's behaviour, actions or how they identify.

9/ Do couples stay together?

Every couple has their own individual journey. Some stay together as a couple, some explore open relationships & some decide its best to separate.


What people say about their experience

Our client feedback is overwhelmingly positive, with 96% of women reporting increased self-esteem and ability to make decisions.


“It’s been a life saver, literally”

I have completely unloaded onto the counsellor and she wasn’t shocked. I’ve been able to understand what’s happened to my husband and work out what it means for me and the children. It’s been a life saver, literally.


“I’ve felt very alone – until I came here”

The counsellor really understands. No one else seems to ‘get it’ and I’ve felt very alone – until I came here.


“I can really say it all aloud”

He’s my best friend and a wonderful father. He wants to stay for now as long as he can explore his feelings for men. I’m finding all that really hard. The counsellor’s been the only person I can really say it all aloud to…

Over the shoulder shot of a counsellor.  Sourced from Pexels

We provide support
to over 250 women partners every year

Women Partners purpose is to help women navigate the unexpected myriad of emotions which often present having discovered their relationship was not what they thought. Helping to support the sexual health and healing journey for women and their families, Women Partners focus is to help empower women to travel their own path forward however that may look.

Women Partners Free of Charge Icon

Free of charge

Our services are fully-funded by NSW Health to provide support free of charge.

Women Partners Experienced Icon


You are in safe & experienced hands. Our registered counsellors take a holistic, trauma informed, strengths-based approach to support women.

Women Partners Confidential Icon


We maintain a strict policy of confidentiality across all our services.